My hair is growing. It's always growing, like everyone elses, but mine is growing ESPECIALLY fast. Like rocket ship hair. Or maybe those weird vines from Jumanji. So I started buying hair elastics like there was going to be a hair elastic famine and I was going to be that person whose hair spends the first day of the famine trying to EAT MY FACE and makes off with one of my eyeballs and part of my nose.
Yeah. It's gross. That's what I am afraid of. You would be buying up tons of elastics, too.
But I forgot that other people would be visiting my house.
Anyways, that led to this discussion...
Jason: You have hair elastics everywhere. Me: Yes. Jason: I mean everywhere. They are on every door knob, every table, the floor. Everywhere. Me, thinking of the one that just got stuck on my foot while I was on the toilet: ... Yes.
No worries, the hair will go after those who judge my hair-elastic-buying-habits shortly after it takes over the world. Medusa's hair has nothing on mine right now. Nothing.
And if I ever need a bungee cord that can hold my entire apartment together, I can make one from scratch. So there.