Lappy Toppy - Saddest, Country-Lovin' Laptop Ever
As some of you might know, Jay is an IT guy. He likes to fix stuff. At the cottage he was looking for the cats and he found my old laptop (Lappy Toppy) on the top of a cupboard. He pulled it down and asked me what was wrong with it.
"Well.... it only works in the country."
You might also be sitting at your computer, incredulous. But let me tell you... this laptop seriously loves the country. As soon as it gets within Toronto city limits, the only side of itself that it will show you is the pretty blue-screened side. But yeah. Try telling someone that and have them take you seriously. You have to drive them and Lappy Toppy to and from the countryside at least 4 or 5 times in order for it to sink in.
So a couple hours pass and Jay clearly wants to try it out so he drags it out and plugs it in.
"Oh. Um, you need the clamp."
Lappy Toppy has a small problem. Three days after my warranty was up I dropped it on the ground and the circuit board that connects the power source to everything else cracked. I tried to get it fixed but... well anyways, there were issues and I realized that if I jammed the power cord into the laptop super hard, it would squish the circuit board together enough to connect the cracked sides together and Lappy Toppy could charge. The problem with this was that every time I did that the circuit board would move a tiny bit further into the computer, meaning that the next time I went to charge it I would need to apply even more force.
Following true Farquharson logic, my mom suggested a clamp. (She may not have been born Farquharson, but she definitely thinks like one). Thankfully, my dad left us many many clamps when he died and we had a huge selection to choose from. So I would clamp my power cable into my computer and use it like that.
All the time.
The problem is that I was living in Stratford during the week and commuting back to Toronto on weekends (this is how Lappy Toppy learned to distinguish between country and city life) and carrying a huge old laptop, all my luggage for the weekend, and a massive clamp that weighed about 15 pounds. This was totally traumatic for Lappy Toppy, obviously.
So I explained all of this to Jay. He started laughing at the part where he realized that the clamp I had used was metal and not plastic. He was so incredulous that he repeated it a few times, which was a bit insulting since I frickin' carried it and I KNOW THAT IT WAS METAL. He also kept repeating "I can't believe this", and I'm not too sure about that one either, since he does know me pretty well by now. In the end, we were too lazy to go find a clamp so we just put the laptop back on top of the cupboard. It makes a good cat landing pad. It's also happy there, since you don't get any more country than the top of a cottage cupboard.