We had a heat wave last week. I know you all know this, because it seemed to be affecting all of North America. We have a portable air conditioner, but that's about it as far as cooling off the house goes. Last week, the air conditioner started only really spewing out "kind of cooler than boiling hot" air.
I should stop here to add that I have NO PATIENCE for being either hot or itchy. You know how some people become a different person when they haven't eaten on time or when they are under severe stress or whatever? Yeah, heat and itchiness are my triggers.
I tried to sleep in our bed, because that's where Jay is, and also my alarm clock. After 3 minutes the heat effect kicked in and I got mad at Jay for giving off heat (Yeah. I know. I'm the worst person ever.) and stomped to the guest room, where the air conditioner is. It was still boiling hot, even with the air blowing right on me, and a standing fan, and a ceiling fan. I was punching my pillow and sighing heavily so Jay would feel bad for me. I'm pretty sure he couldn't hear me over all the fan noises, but Finn's supersonic hearing woke him up and he came up on the guest bed to snuggle and make me feel better... BY LYING RIGHT ON TOP OF ME.
At this point, I started feeling suspicious that Jay was SLEEPING, which seemed super unfair. So to make myself feel better by complaining to SOMEONE I complained to twitter. Nobody was awake, so that didn't really help but the noise I made must have attracted Lucy, who came and slept right beside me, snuggled as close as she could get to me without touching Finn.
I started wriggling to get away from all the hot animals but every time I moved, they just snuggled closer. So I gave up and tried to sleep. But every time I juuuuuust about fell asleep, Finn would wake up and start licking the sweat off my legs and arms with his sticky hot dog tongue.
But you know what? Although Finn's lucky he didn't get kicked in the head when I woke up to him licking me the first time, I didn't kick them off the bed. They were just trying to help.