All tagged mess

Double Plunger Walk Of Shame

I'm having a rough week and it seems a thousand things are going wrong. As in my previous post, I have completely lost control of my apartment and eating habits. Jay got so fed up with the Brita water smelling like rotting vegetation that he finally spearheaded a movement to clean out my fridge, which I had just stopped opening. (Duh, if it smells bad when you open the door, stop opening the door.)

When The Going Gets Tough, Fall Asleep In Your Laundry

am having "One Of Those Weeks". You know, when everything seems to be going SO wrong that you actually give up on fixing things or even mentally processing what's happening and just eat ice cream and rice out of the pot and fall asleep in the middle of your carpet on top of all of your not-quite-dry laundry after a Cheetos Binge? And then you wake up kind of clammy at 2am with a Cheeto brick in your digestive tract?

The Girl Needs Her Hair Ties. Also, I Am 'The Girl'.

My hair is growing. It's always growing, like everyone elses, but mine is growing ESPECIALLY fast. Like rocket ship hair. Or maybe those weird vines from Jumanji. So I started buying hair elastics like there was going to be a hair elastic famine and I was going to be that person whose hair spends the first day of the famine trying to EAT MY FACE and makes off with one of my eyeballs and part of my nose.

Do Not Wack And Unwrap When Angry

I wasn't having the greatest day. In fact, I just received a phone call that made me rise out of my seat, cleanching my fists and growling my one coworkers name with a murderous gleam in my eye. Caileigh tried to distract me and make me feel better by offering me some of her chocolate orange.

"You need to WACK AND UNWRAP THESE!", I cried.